Random Nonsense – My Twin

The other day I was having a conversation with a friend of mine about the idea of identical twins. In having this conversation it occurred to me that were I to have an identical twin… I don’t know as I’d be so comfortable with it.

For instance, if I looked in the mirror would I sometimes think I’m looking at my twin? Would I attempt to have a conversation with my reflection? By extension, could my twin show up in a doorway or window dressed like me and convince me that I’m looking at my reflection?

Or, if I had an identical twin, how would I know which one of us was me? Would I panic all the time if someone called me the twin’s name? Would I come when called if I was beckoned as such? If so, would I proceed as though I were my identical twin?

I thought about the above and realized something… if I was smart enough and quick enough, I could be the twin that drives my brother insane!

What would I do, you ask? Well… why would you ask that? I would dress up like my twin and stand in a doorway, or even maybe cut out a window and make him believe that he was looking at his reflection! I’d put a smudge of chocolate on my cheek and make him keep rubbing at his own, never coming off! He’d go to Mother and she’d tell him “Oh you’re fine – there’s nothing on your cheek at all!” and he’d run back to the “mirror” only to find that the chocolate is in all actuality still there!  Now he can’t trust Mother! Who can he trust? His life is a lie and he just wants this chocolate to come off!

Or, if it had been established that my twin and I – while looking exactly the same – had completely different personalities, I’d start acting like him. He’d recognize this behavior and begin to question whether or not he was him or me. As an added bonus, I probably wouldn’t even have to tell other people to call me by his name – they’d just do it! And even Mother would be confused! She would think I was him too! If I did that, would he then start acting like me? Could I thereby trick him into switching identities?

I could even convince him that before computers and photocopiers, a team of editors actually had to type out every single copy of every book ever written! (that one has nothing to do with twins… I just didn’t have anywhere else to put that material).

The possibilities are endless! It’s the best kind of identity theft! Having an identical twin wouldn’t be that bad at all! I’d be the Lord and Master of all things identically-twinny!

Oh… how I wish I had an identical twin.

Ender Bowen is a writer, producer and actor, originally from Northern New York, who now lives with wife Emily Steele in Nashville, TN. Bowen is additionally a singer/songwriter, a member of comedy troupe Common Sense for Dummys, and co-host of podcast Topical Vacation.

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One Response

  1. Beginnerer Mar 04, 2011 -

    I AM YOUR TWIN!!!!!

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